Review of SEOULMEYT: Persuasive Pretender

 May 30, 2024

Luneta "Lunie" (Kim Molina), eldest daughter of the Paticul family, was a rabid fan of handsome K-drama actors, like many of her neighbors. Her peaceful existence all changed when a massive storm hit their village.  The strong rains fell for four days straight, causing destructive floods. Lunie's mother (Candy Pangilinan) and her younger siblings (Stanley Abuloc and Kylie Labrador) survived, but sadly, their father did not. 

Juanito Mamaril (Jerald Napoles) was a Filipino working as a bodyguard for Park Empire Korea (or PEK), a massive construction firm.  One day, his boss Madame Park Mi-ni (Jobelyn Manuel) assigned him to go with her son Park Ju-tae (Ha Ju-young) to Lunie's community to promote their rehab proposals. At the last minute, the spoiled heir refused to show up, so Juanito had to quickly come up with Plan B to get the contact signed. 

Writer-director Darryl Yap had written and directed his entire filmography. He exploded into the mainstream scene with "#Jowable" (2019). In 2021, he had an incredible consecutive 10-movie blast, all on Vivamax. His next two films were both politically-charged and courted massive controversy -- "Maid in Malacanang" (2022) and "Martyr or Murderer" (2023). He is now back to provocative comedies -- "Para Kang Papa Mo" (2023) and now, this new one.  

Kim Molina launched her lead star status on the big screen via Darryl Yap's "#Jowable" in 2019.  Molina and Yap got together for a second time with "Ang Babaeng Walang Pakiramdam" (2021), this time with her real-life boyfriend Jerald Napoles as leading man. The three of them are now reunited once again for this new film that brought them to shoot on location in South Korea. This second collaboration was better than the first.  

That Napoles passed for a Korean man ("White Chicks" style) in itself is already silly, and that no-one ever questioned it, even more so. However, Napoles playing Jun-jun so seriously in perfect deadpan, plus the cute romantic chemistry he generated with Molina carried this film over the absurdity of its premise. Napoles and Molina's attempt to set a time record in the final scene was also amusing, but after 5 minutes of them still going at it, I really had to go. 

Supporting actors also get to shine. Alma Moreno was scene-stealing as Juanito's mother Sally, along with Loren Marinas as his sister Jennifer. Hashtag Kid Yambao, who would probably have made a more convincing Korean man with less prosthetics, made a good impression as Juanito's co-bodyguard Sonny Boy. On the more serious side, Isay Alvarez played a neighbor Nanay Gigi, whose husband Bert went missing during the storm. 

After his two heated real-life political dramas, it was refreshing to have Yap back to comedy. Plenty of jokes were on the green side with several sexual double-entendres with the names, but were admittedly funny.  Call me shallow, but the funniest joke for me was when Lunie told Sonny Boy the story of how she Luneta and her siblings MM and Paris got their names. Now, I will not spoil that joke for you, so you will have more reason to go watch this. 7/10.

Review of THE GARFIELD MOVIE: Feline Finding Father

May 29, 2024

Garfield (voiced by Chris Pratt) was a fat, gluttonous, orange tabby cat who lived happily with his master Jon Arbuckle (voiced by Nicholas Hoult) and his beagle dog Odie. One night, Garfield and Odie were kidnapped from Jon's house by two unknown  dogs -- a giant shar pei Roland (Brett Goldstein) and a fidgety whippet Nolan (Bowen Yang). They turned out to be the henchmen of Jinx (Hannah Waddingham), a white Persian cat bent on revenge.  

In the course of this adventure, Garfield finally got to meet his long-estranged father Vic (Samuel L. Jackson). The last time Garfield saw Vic was that very night that kitten Garfield met the lonely Jon while he was eating alone in a family Italian restaurant. Garfield had long held a bitter grudge on Vic, believing that his father had abandoned him. Meanwhile, Jinx also had a major axe to grind with Vic, and that was why they were all brought together. 

This new animated film directed by Mark Dindal is already the second movie about Jim Davis' famous cartoon cat Garfield. The first one was "Garfield: The Movie" (2004), a live-action film that featured the lazy drawl of Bill Murray as the voice of the CGI-Garfield. Davis's comic strip began to take off in the late 1970s. It never really left the comics pages until the present, even if David has long relegated the work to his assistants since the 1990s. 

This film was a mishmash of different common tropes seen in other recent animated films. The cutest segment for me was Jon and Garfield's first meeting over pizza and lasagna, as the design of Garfield as a kitten was most adorable. The majority of the film was a heist to carjack a truckload of milk from a theme park -- this was very reminiscent of "Migration" and "Chicken Run 2", both of which also had father-child bonding as its emotional core.

The antagonist Jinx was too over-the-top as her elaborate revenge scheme felt contrived and silly. It was also not made too clear why she had two dogs at her beck and call. The climactic fight scene on the running train (an overused set piece in action films), that followed a kiddy version of the laws of physics. With these new characters dominating the story, Jon was pushed to the sidelines. Those waiting for Liz, Arlene and Nermal will be disappointed. 5/10

Netflix: Review of ATLAS: AI Ambivalence

May 27, 2024

28 years ago, an AI named Harlan (Simu Liu) went rogue and led a massive AI rebellion which left 3 million humans dead. The International Coalition of Nations managed to force him to escape into outer space in order to avoid captivity. While on exile somewhere in the Andromeda Galaxy, Harlan spent his time hatching a complicated plot that would ultimately destroy the human race, against whom he carried a massive grudge. 

Atlas Shepherd (Jennifer Lopez) was a data analyst who was obsessed with capturing Harlan. Atlas had a deep distrust for anything AI,  particularly wary against neural links which allowed the AI access into the brain of the person it was linked with. When Harlan's agent Casca Decius (Abraham Popoola) was captured on Earth, Atlas was able to figure out where Harlan was, and was determined to go along with the rangers sent to capture him.

When the lead character had a name like Atlas, one can't help but suspect that the original hero was supposed to be male, but gender-swapped to accommodate a superstar producer like Jennifer Lopez to play him. To her credit, she was really fully invested in making Atlas her own. Although at the start, Lopez's Atlas was quite the annoying whining brat even as her very life relied on cooperating a mech suit AI named Smith (Gregory James Cohan). 

However, as Atlas eventually unloaded her emotional baggage to Smith, Lopez does succeed to win the viewer over to side with her, no matter they felt about her at the start.  That scene was not easy to do since Lopez was mostly acting by herself while talking to a disembodied voice, and Lopez does pull it off. There was also a lot of wit and sarcasm between Atlas and Smith, and their tongue-in-cheek interaction was quite humorous. 

Director Brad Peyton was best known for directing three of Dwayne Johnson action flicks "Journey 2: The Mysterious Island" (2012), "San Andreas" (2015), and "Rampage" (2018). For "Atlas," it looked like Netflix gave him a generous budget to work on the special visual effects to create the futuristic milieu where this story takes place. The battle sequences may look quite cartoonish like video games, but they were still entertaining to watch. 6/10. 

Vivamax: Mini-Reviews of DIRTY ICE CREAM, BALINSASAYAW, KULONG

May 24, 2024

DIRTY ICE CREAM

Director: Mervyn Brondial

Headwriter: John Carlo Pacala

Writers: Steve Sanchez, Matt Teves

There was a summer heatwave. Subdivision neighbors cousins Geng (Christy Imperial), and Rocemay (Jem Milton), housemaid Aini (Candy Veloso), matron Donna (Yda Manzano) all got very excited when they heard the bells of the Surebets dirty ice cream cart, being rung by hunky vendors Monch (Ghion Espinosa) and Junebert (Seonwoo Kim). To make a sale, the guys allowed the women to touch their abs, and then some.

This absurd premise was wisely played as a goofy comedy. There were scenes of the ladies pleasuring themselves first, before we see couplings of men and women, then women and women. We learned fun facts, like it costs P5000 to buy the whole cart of ice cream, and both boys included for an additional P1000; or that safecracking is a course at TESDA. To its credit, it had a surprise ending twist, as proof that effort was taken in writing the story. 4/10

BALINSASAYAW

Director: Rodante Pajemna, Jr.

Writers: Rodante Pajemna, Jr., Steve Sanchez, Matt Teves

The most handsome rascal in town Carlo (Benz Sangalang) just got married to the richest girl in town, Rowena (Aiko Garcia), the daughter of the late provincial governor. During their wedding reception, a guest from Australia showed up to give a message. She was Ivy (Apply Dy), Rowena's long-estranged best friend, and, incidentally, Carlo's ex-girlfriend. Right there and then, despite Rowena's protests, Carlo invited Ivy to stay in their house. 

In this melodrama, we won't know who the real antagonist was up to the very end, as both had suspicious motives to hurt her. Aside from Garcia and Dy, also very busy with sex scenes was Jonica Lazo as Sandra, the promiscuous wife of Kapitan (Mark Dionisio). Just to pad up the sex scene quota, even very minor characters like Ivy's friend Mona (Aria Bench), Kapitan's messenger Bong (Mark Capilador), and Rowena's doctor Roman (JR Frias) had romps. 3/10.

KULONG

Director: Sigrid Polon

Writer: Frederick Castro

Three college friends, Minerva (Jenn Rosa), Love (Aica Veloso) and Tisay (Cariz Manzano), wanted to join a screenplay-writing contest. They confined themselves at a resort to get started with their writing. The subject matter could be in any genre, but it had to be sexy. However, the girls shared that they all had not had any sex for years. They decide to seduce the resort caretaker Boie (JD Aguas) for some "inspiration, research and experience." 

When I learned that the girls were to write a film script, I hoped they would take us through the entire scriptwriting process. Alas, these things are not the priority here in Vivamax. Instead we get all three girls having a go with the shy Boie, and with each other. Random characters like the delivery boys for food Jelon (Ralph Christian Engle), and water Rom (Ghion Espinosa) also had their turns with the girls. 4/10. 

Review of FURIOSA: A MAD MAX SAGA: Girl's Got Grit

May 23, 2024

In her effort to keep a group of bikers away from the Green Place of Many Mothers, child Furiosa (Alyla Browne) was taken captive. The leader of the Biker Horde, Dementus (Chris Hemsworth), brought her to the Citadel where he negotiated a trade with Immortan Joe (Lachy Hulme) and his foolish sons Rictus Erectus (Nathan Jones) and Scabrous Scrotus (Josh Helman). Joe gained possession of Furiosa as part of their deal.  

One day, teen Furiosa (Anya Taylor-Joy) saw her chance to escape from the Citadel and find her way back home. She stowed away under the trailer truck driven by Praetorian Jack (Tom Burke). However, the Biker Horde hounded them across the Wasteland, all the way to two fortresses Gas Town and Bullet Farm. When Dementus himself caught up with her, Furiosa was captured and chained her left arm over her head.  

The last Mad Max film "Fury Road" was so good and so memorable, it was amazing to think that this was released in May 2015. With close-cropped hair and one prosthetic arm, Furiosa, played by with grit and verve by Charlize Theron, had such a powerful screen presence, even outshining Mad Max (Tom Hardy) himself. We already knew back then that she was abducted as a child, but this prequel fleshed that story out, and then some.

Anya Taylor-Joy only showed up as the teenage Furiosa in the second hour already. Those viewers who only knew her from her breakout role as a chess prodigy in Netflix series "The Queen's Gambit" (2020) will be surprised to see her in a rough, dirty, brutal pure action role like this, and she only had a few lines to say. However, she convinced us that her Furiosa could totally grow up to be Theron's Furiosa. 

Chris Hemsworth played a formidable antagonist Dementus. Only he could pull off driving that monster truck with giant wheels. However, Hemsworth carried with him a lot of his star power, goodwill and sense of humor, so he did not really come off as pure evil (even if Dementus was). The scenes of Tom Burke's Praetorius Jack with Taylor-Joy were stoic but strong, action-packed, yet with emotional connection.  

Director George Miller really knows his Australian Wasteland milieu very well and he knew how to get both the beauty and the harshness of this extreme environment.  Several Fury Road crew were back, like film editor Margaret Sixel, production designer Colin Gibson, composer Tom Holkenborg, sound Ben Osmo, costumes Jenny Beavan and makeup Lesley Vanderwalt. The look and sound of "Furiosa" was very familiar, yet with their own unique points of chaotic excellence. 8/10. 

MY REVIEWS OF 8 NORA AUNOR FILMS FROM 2011-2020

May 21, 2024

According to Wikipedia, National Artist for Film and Broadcast Arts Ms. Nora Aunor starred in 13 feature films in the past decade, 2011 to 2020. Fortunately, I had been able to watch and write reviews about eight of them, even if they had been indie films which had not been easily available for mainstream audiences to watch.

THY WOMB (2012)

Director: Brillante Mendoza

Writer: Henry Burgos

A middle-aged Moslem Badjao woman named Shaleha (Nora Aunor) living in Tawi-tawi. She was a midwife, and collected the umbilical cords of the babies she delivered as a souvenir of her career. However, because she herself was childless, she took it upon herself to find a suitable second wife for her husband Bangas-An (Bembol Roco) to have a child of his own, unmindful of the consequences this decision might impose on her. 9/10

MY FULL REVIEW

HINULID (2016)

Director: Kristian Cordero

Writer: Kristian Cordero

Sita Dimaiwat (Nora Aunor) is a very religious Catholic woman who lived in Naga with her one son named Lukas. As a young boy, Lukas was very close to their parish priest, memorizing all his catechism and prayers. As a young man (Jess Mendoza), he chose to take up Law in Manila instead, memorizing his jurisprudence textbooks. One day, he joined a political rally and was killed. Sita went to recover her son's remains and rode a train to bring him back to their hometown. 8/10

MY FULL REVIEW

TUOS (2016)

Director: Derick Cabrido

In the mountainous hinterlands of Antique, there is a tribe that lives in ancient tradition. Their respected elder is a woman they call a "binukot" -- a cloistered woman who kept the oral tradition alive by memorizing their epics and singing them on special ceremonies. The current binukot Pina-Ilog (Nora Aunor), with her head of thick floor-length gray hair, is preparing her own granddaughter Dowokan (Barbie Forteza) as the fair maiden chosen to be the new binukot princess. 8/10

MY FULL REVIEW

DEMENTIA (2014)

Director: Perci Intalan

Writers: Renei Dimla and Jun Lana

Mara Fabre (Nora Aunor) has been diagnosed with early stage dementia. She was brought back to her remote hometown in Batanes by her cousin Elaine (Bing Loyzaga) to help her recover her memories. Mara keeps getting visions of a playful little girl or a masked bride, whom she called Olivia. As the Olivia's ghostly games become more sinister, will Mara and Elaine's family be able to escape with their sanity or their lives? 8/10

MY FULL REVIEW

ANG KUWENTO NI MABUTI (2013)

Director: Mes de Guzman

Writer: Mes De Guzman

Mabuti (Nora Aunor) is a folk healer in a remote hilly area of Nueva Vizcaya. She is known for her cheerfulness, friendliness and kindness.  She lives with her Mother (Josephina Estabillo) and two adult children, Ompong and Lucia (Arnold Reyes and Mara Lopez).  Ompong has one daughter, indulgently named Kate Winslet.  Lucia is very unlucky in her relationships, having three daughters (Lenlen, Angge and Mimay) with three different men.  7/10

MY FULL REVIEW

HUSTISYA (2014)

Director: Joel Lamangan

Writer: Ricky Lee

Virginia Cabahug, more known by her nickname Biring (Nora Aunor), is a trusted aide of a bigtime human trafficking queen Vivian (Rosanna Roces). She does the rounds with the payoffs and deliveries walking around with her umbrella, white bag and thermos jug.  One day, Biring gets framed for murder.  While in prison, she was linked up with a hotshot young lawyer, Atty. Gerald (Rocco Nacino). The attorney not only gets Biring released, but also revealed bigger plans for her within their organization. 6/10

MY FULL REVIEW

WHISTLEBLOWER (2016)

Director: Adolfo Alix, Jr.

Writer: Rody Vera

Zeny Roblado (Nora Aunor), an accountant was rescued by the NBI when she was illegally detained by her boss Lorna Valera (Cherrie Pie Picache). Roblado revealed that Valera's "business" were bogus NGOs which siphoned huge amounts of money from the government only to wind up in the greedy hands of politicians and Valera herself. As Roblado blows the whistle in Senate hearings, the lives of everyone involved in the drama are put through a dangerous wringer. 6/10

MY FULL REVIEW

ISA PANG BAHAGHARI (2020)

Director: Joel Lamangan

Writer: Joel Lamangan and Eric  Santos

Dom (Philip Salvador) suddenly came back home after twenty years of being presumed dead. He first went to see Rhey (Michael de Mesa), now working as a hairdresser and a drag performer. Dom then asked to be brought to Lumen (Nora Aunor), now a cripple working on dried fish in a seaside town, so he can beg for forgiveness for abandoning her and their three children, namely Andy (Zanjoe Marudo), Peter (Joseph Marco) and Dolly (Sanya Lopez), all of whom now led troubled lives. 5/10

MY FULL REVIEW

Review of IF: Fostering Fantasy Friends

May 20, 2024

Even since her mother died of cancer a few years ago, Bea (Cailey Fleming) tried her best to act like an adult. One day, she had to stay in the New York City apartment of her grandmother Margaret (Fiona Shaw) while her father (John Krasinski) was in a hospital awaiting surgery. Even though her father tried to cheer her up with things they used to do when she was younger, Bea would insist that she was not a child anymore. 

One night, she met Cal (Ryan Reynolds), a man who worked with cute creatures who turned out to be imaginary friends (or IF for short). Blue (Steve Carell) was a delightfully big furry purple giant. Blossom (Phoebe Waller-Bridge) was a butterfly with black tubular arms and legs, wearing a pale pink dress, vest and gloves. They had been abandoned when their children grew up. Bea thought she could help Cal help them.

Cailey Fleming started her movie career playing a child Rey in "Star Wars: The Force Awakens" (2015). She may already be 17 now, but Fleming still looked very much like a bright-eyed pre-teen girl here in "IF," much like Lindsay Lohan or Ariana Grande when they were that age. As Cal, Ryan Reynolds pretty much reprised his role in "Free Guy,"  interacting with a host of computer-generated characters in comic action situations.  

Cal brought Bea and us into Memory Lane Retirement Home, a secret place under the swing ride of the Coney Island amusement park to meet more IFs. This colorful haven for retired IF's was under the charge of an old teddy bear named Lewis (Louis Gossett, Jr.). The production designer had a fun field day creating different sets for various IFs, voiced by an array of stars, like Emily Blunt, Bradley Cooper, Matt Damon, George Clooney, Amy Schumer, etc...

The poster seemed to promise a live-action version of "Monsters, Inc" as Blue looked a lot like Sully. However, the main story turned out to be a lot more sentimental. I do not remember myself nor any of my kids having an imaginary friend at all when we were children. When they defined what the title "IF" actually meant, I thought I would not be able to connect emotionally. Unexpectedly, I did get teary-eyed at the end, and that felt good.  7/10. 

Review of ISANG GABI: Coincidence or Control?

May 16, 2024

One night, Dindo (Diego Loyzaga) was drinking alone in a bar in Chinatown. When he was about to leave, he realized he forgot to bring his wallet. His argument with the waiter was overheard by the young lady in the next table, Karla (Coleen Garcia), who offered to pay his bill. The two walked around outside to get to know each other better. Karla suggested that for this one night, they are obliged to open up to each other, and tell only the truth.  

From there, the two began to share stories about themselves and their families. Dindo is a literature professor in PUP now, but he used to work as a janitor for his college tuition. Since both his parents are deceased, he was raised by his older sister (Angela Orfalas). Karla married her wealthiest suitor Andrew (Alex Medina) right out of college. With this, she was able to achieve her childhood dream of living in a big house with five bedrooms.

For the story and screenplay of this film, National Artist for Film Ricky Lee came up with a complex tale that started out as a straightforward sharing of sad stories between two strangers. However, it would eventually turn out to be a twist-filled melodrama with multiple scandalous revelations coming out at every turn right up to the end. To be honest, the nature of these shocking surprises were quite contrived, requiring suspension of disbelief.

Most of the stories exchanged were sexual in nature -- the "first time", rape and even pornography. So if Karla was played by AJ Raval or Angeli Khang, this could have easily been a Vivamax film, but with more graphic breast exposure (than what Angelica Hart did here) and much longer and acrobatic sex scenes. But since it was Coleen Garcia in the lead, her presence somehow gave this sexy project a modicum of modesty and class. 

Garcia and Loyzaga try their best to keep their performances serious, even if the tales they told got really overwrought. In addition, they spent most of the the second half of the film talking wearing only a shirt and lower underwear, no pants. Yayo Aguila and Soliman Cruz got to show off their stuff in their limited screen time as Andrew's parents. Director Mac Alejandre tried to build up suspense at the ending, until it fell short with that sudden stop. 5/10.

Review of MONKEY MAN: Patel's Punch

May 16, 2024

The Kid (Dev Patel) wore a monkey mask when he fought in an underground fight club called Tiger's Temple, in the city of Yatara in India. The owner Tiger (Sharlto Copley) ordered Kid to always fight to lose, in order to favor the house. One day, he applied to work as a server in a high-class brothel called Kings run by Queenie Kapoor (Ashwini Kalsekar). He became friends with Queenie's henchman Alfonso (Pitobash) so he could get a promotion.  

The Kid had a major axe to grind against spiritual guru-turned-politician Baba Shakti (Makarand Deshpande) and his police chief Rana Singh (Sikandar Kher). These two powerful men were responsible for destroying the Kid's village and murdering his mother Neela (Adithi Kalkunte) when he was just a young boy. When he was given access into the VIP floor, the Kid can finally set his long-gestating plan for revenge into motion. 

This new film was very much in the vein of "John Wick" --  an action movie that told the story of an ordinary man who was pushed to live a life of revenge because a loved one gets killed. However, director, co-writer and star Dev Patel made sure his directorial debut would stand out from the rest of its ilk by having an all-Indian cast and integrating Indian culture and mythology into its story, production and costume designs. 

Patel has certainly matured since we first saw him as a bright-eyed 18-year old TV quiz show contestant in "Slumdog Millionaire" (Danny Boyle, 2008). He has since earned an Oscar-nomination for Supporting Actor in "Lion" (Garth Davis, 2016), and have lately starred in some avant garde projects like "The Personal History of David Copperfield" (Armando Iannucci, 2019) and "Green Knight" (David Lowery, 2021). 

Patel poured in all sorts of fight scenes using all sorts of implements to keep the adrenaline levels of the audience up. The camera was very close to the action it can be dizzying for some. You can see the blood splattering, hear the bones crunching, smell the sweaty bodies and feel the extreme pain. All this brutality, yet due to some illogical and inconsistent execution of  the action, it did not match the levels set by Chad Stahelski or Park Chan-wook. 7/10

Prime Video: Review of THE IDEA OF YOU: Victims of Virality

May 9, 2024

Art gallery owner Solène (Anne Hathaway) just turned 40 years old. She is divorced from her husband Daniel (Reid Scott), and they are co-raising their teenage daughter Izzy (Ella Rubin). One day, while she was chaperoning Izzy and her friends at Coachella, Solène inadvertently entered the trailer of 24 year-old teen idol Hayes Campbell (Nicholas Galitzine), member of the world-famous boy band, August Moon, and had a quick chat with him.

With that brief initial encounter, she made quite an impression on Hayes, and he even dedicated a song to her during the show. After a few days, Hayes paid Solène a surprise visit at her art gallery and wound up at her house to eat sandwiches. Solène was initially concerned about their 14-year age gap, but she eventually agreed to accept his invitation to be with him in their New York and European gigs while Izzy was in summer camp.

This film about a viral May-December affair was co-written and directed by Michael Showalter, based on a novel by author Robinne Lee published in 2017.  While there had been several films tackling a story of older women having affairs with younger men, this one is set during this current time when social media held sway, and public opinion and bashing do have significant effects on real-life relationships and decisions. 

Anne Hathaway joins the long list of A-list actresses who have romanced a much-younger man onscreen, from Anne Bancroft ("The Graduate") in 1967 to Julianne Moore ("May December") in 2023. The smashing look Hathaway had here as Solene, there was no question why Hayes was smitten at first sight. Her beauty attracted him, her personality made him stay, 14-year age gap and tabloid paparazzi notwithstanding. 

29-year old Nicholas Galitzine is on a hot streak as romantic leading man, after musical film "Cinderella" (2021), military drama "Purple Hearts" (2022), and boys love romp "Red, White and Royal Blue" (2023). He can really sing, so he could pull off the boy band scenes, and that was really his voice in the theme song. This film was more Anne Hathaway's show, but by the third act, Galitzine also made his mark as an actor, not only a heartthrob. 7/10. 

 

Review of KINGDOM OF THE PLANET OF THE APES: Rebuilding the Rivalry

May 8, 2024

Many generations after the events of the first three films, the great Caesar was only a name in oral legends among apes.  One day, three young chimps -- Noa (Owen Teague), Soona (Lydia Peckham) and Anaya (Travis Jeffery) -- risked life and limb to steal eagle eggs from nests as required in their tribe customs. However, before the ceremony the next morning, their settlement was invaded and destroyed by another tribe of bigger apes. 

Noa, who was able to survive and avoid capture, rode out into the forest to look for his tribemates. He encountered Raka (Peter Macon), a wise old orangutan, the last survivor of a tribe that preserved Caesar's legacy. A female human whom they named Nova (Freya Allan) also went along with them. While crossing a bridge over a violent river, they encounter brutal apes who served their King -- Proximus Caesar (Kevin Durand). 

As this story happened supposedly centuries after Caesar, writer Josh Friedman and director Wes Ball had to rebuild a whole new world of civilized apes and savage humans. The first act took its time to introduce us to a tribe of chimpanzees that had a special relationship with eagles, represented by Noa, the central character of these new stories. The second act brought us to the world beyond Noa's ken just as he was discovering it himself.

While the computer-generated, motion-capture imagery of the chimps and apes were as impressive as before, the first two acts took quite a bit of time to tell its story and introduces its new characters. However, by the third act when Noa and Nova (who called herself Mae) were in the seaside kingdom of Proximus Caesar, that was only then that the main point of this reboot-sequel (and its own sequels to come, if ever) was fully revealed   

The explosive wet and wild action set pieces of Act 3 set-up a renewed man vs. ape rivalry that started the whole franchise off in the original 1968 film. In setting this conflict up, I had questions aplenty about the timelines of the story. How could the events of Act 3 be logically possible if it actually happened 300 years after Caesar? Was there a time warp? Was there a time travel? I guess we'll see those answers in the sequel. 7/10

SPOILER ALERT

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It was strange how the way Mae et al talked, looked and dressed, as if no time had passed by since the present, much less 3 centuries into the future. The technology the humans had looked like they're from our time now, yet they are functioning without a hitch after 300 years? How long had that armory built into that seaside cliff been abandoned all these centuries? Hence I was thinking that a time event must have happened. 

300 years of multiple human generations staying a secret from the apes is asking for a massive suspension of disbelief. Can humans remain under conditions requiring utmost discipline and loyalty for 300 years -- and actually cooperate? Are there William H. Macy's out there in cahoots with apes, yet keeping the existence of similar humans a secret for several generations without spilling any hints?

I liked the Ape part of the story where Noa had a rich and meaningful journey of discovery, not only about himself, but also about other Apes and their shared history. It's the Man part of the story I didn't like, and I also don't like where it seems to be leading, especially after seeing Mae's behavior in her interactions with Noa. In the coming face-off between Ape and Man (as surely coming up in the sequel), I'd actually side with the Apes!

Vivamax: Mini-Reviews of RED FLAG, LATE BLOOMER and LADY GUARD

 May 6, 2024

RED FLAG

Director: Lakambini Morales

Writers: John Carlo Pacala, Lakambini Morales

Headwriter: John Carlo Pacala

Gina (Micaella Raz) was a sales agent in the used car business.  Red (Mon Mendoza) was the new guy on the job. Despite all the rumors about Red being a womanizer from her best friend on the job Lance (Mhack Morales), Gina still fell for Red's "irresistible" masculine charms. However one night, Gina herself witnessed Red romancing their big boss, Ms. Mara (Joana David) who promised him a promotion when he gave in to her advances. 

This is another one of those overused Vivamax tropes where the story is set in a specific workplace and the characters use sex with customers to land multiple sales and with the boss to get themselves a promotion. This plot was centered on the used car sales business, just as "Showroom" (2022) was for the condominium sales business. Mon Mendoza was terribly miscast as Red because there was nothing charming about him and how he portrayed this character. 2/10.

LATE BLOOMER

Director: Rodante Y. Pajemna, Jr.

Headwriter: JC Pacala

Writer: Nigel Santos

Therese (Robb Guinto) and Maddie (Erika Balagtas) were best friends and partners in their advertising firm. Maddie thought her OFW boyfriend Arthur (Mikhael Padual) was rusty and lacked practice in bed. Meanwhile, Robb was diagnosed with MDS (myelodysplastic syndrome), and decided to reopen her sex life with guys like Luigi (Jasper Torres), Aries (Ardy Raymundo) and her ex Jimmy (Mark Coplador), but was still not finding enough satisfaction. 

Therese was such a disappointing role for Robb Guinto as it did not fit her classy image at all. It would have been better if she and Erika Balagtas traded places because Maddie's strong character was better fit for Guinto's magnetic screen presence.  The writing was nothing to crow about, but at least there was effort exerted on research as it dealt with a disease entity called MDS which I did not know about, so this made me look it up on Google learn more about it. 2/10.

LADY GUARD

Director: Bobby Bonifacio, Jr.

Head Writer: John Carlo Pacala

Writers: Steve Sanchez, Matt Teves

Estelle (Angela Morena) was the strict lady guard of a parcel delivery service warehouse. Estelle oriented the new guard Meryl (Irish Tan) the tricks of her trade for earning extra bucks under the table. She blackmailed her plant manager Janus (Anthony Dabao) for his illegal activities with cash and sex.  At night, when their boss (Arrian Labios) was away, Janus allowed outsiders to conduct a Colored Dice gambling game for the employees, from which Estelle also took a cut.

In the tradition of noble occupations besmirched by Vivamax, this time it's the turn of lady security guards.  A very distracting thing about this particular film were those deliberately glaring blobs of light which appear whenever the front of the guard uniforms were in full view, seemingly to hide incriminating names on them. To be consistent, Bonifacio would also use these bright lights to "enhance" the drab warehouse backgrounds of his sex scenes. 3/10.

Netflix: Review of PULA: A Corrupted Coco

May 5, 2024

Daniel Faraon (Coco Martin) worked as a police officer in the town of Pola, Oriental Mindoro, under Chief of Police P/Capt. Raymond P. Anacta (Raymart Santiago). He lived with his wife, school teacher Magda (Julia Montes) and their two young sons. One day, Daniel and Ramona Abella (Jennifer "Ina" Mindanao Cruz) were assigned to investigate a corpse of a young woman found in a grassy area in remote Barangay Bato. 

The deceased was identified to be Patricia (Christine Bermas), the teenage daughter of Canor and Elena Rivera (Allan Paule and Lotlot de Leon). Her parents were very religious folk, regular churchgoers who prayed the rosary every night. However, Patricia would sneak behind her folks' back to meet her boyfriend Jeff (Vince Rillon) for naughty trysts. After Patricia was buried, prime suspect Jeff had already skipped town and gone off to Manila. 

Coco Martin became a huge mainstream star following his long-running TV series "Ang Probinsyano" (2015-2022). Since then, he still goes back to his indie roots with his original mentor director Brillante Mendoza. Their partnership as lead actor and director started with "Masahista" (2005), followed by Cannes-pedigreed films "Serbis" (2008) and "Kinatay" (2009) -- the latter even winning Mendoza the coveted Best Director award in Cannes. 

Their last project together was "Apag" (2022), an unsettling film with a grisly ending where Martin played a very flawed lead character very different from his iconic TV hero persona Cardo Dalisay. This time around, Mendoza upped the ante on corrupting Martin's stellar image some more by casting him as the insidious monster Daniel Faraon, whose pent-up violence exploded full blast berserk when his reprehensible secret was revealed.  

My main beef about this movie was about how supporting actress Christine Bermas was treated in this movie. Yes, she began her career doing Vivamax soft porn movies, making an auspicious debut in "Siklo" (2022). However, she did show promise as an actress even if the projects did not really serve to showcase her talents. When I saw her name in the cast of "Pula," I thought she would finally do a movie without having to bare. 

But alas, her breasts were still exposed unnecessarily in an early playful scene with her boyfriend, and later during her rape scene. However, the worst of the lot was that scene when her remains were shown to her parents. When her face was revealed, the sheet was lifted all the way to expose her two breasts the whole time. How could Lotlot de Leon allow a scene where she had to cry over her dead daughter with her bosoms bare for all to see?! For that matter, how could Jennifer Mindanao Cruz, in the role of a police officer and being the real-life mayor of Pola town, not object to this offensive scene being shot? 

The sickening feeling of exploitation gets even worse when it was revealed by Elena that Patricia was only 15 years old, so the more then that her modesty was preserved during the investigation. A WCPD (Women and Children Protection Desk) officer should have been there to keep the victim, both a female and a child, safe. Her tombstone even stated that she was born July 15, 2006 and died April 11, 2018, making her all of 11 years old. Even if the actress Christine Bermas is already a consenting adult at 23, her character Patricia (at 15 or 11) is still very much a minor, so sensitivity should have been observed in her delicate scenes. 1/10.

 

Review of THE FALL GUY: Fractured and Framed

May 3, 2024

Colt Seavers (Ryan Gosling) was the stunt double for big action star Tom Ryder (Aaron Taylor-Johnson). One day, a stunt where Colt was supposed to fall backwards from a tall height did not go as planned, Colt broke his back.  While he recovered from his injury, Colt disappeared from the filmmaking scene totally, not even say goodbye to his girlfriend Jody Moreno (Emily Blunt), who worked behind the camera on several films he worked in. 

Eighteen months later, Colt found work as a valet for a Mexican restaurant. Producer Gail Meyer (Hannah Waddingham) suddenly called telling him to fly over to Sydney for her latest film project with Tom Ryder.  When Colt declined, Gail revealed that she had offered this new sci-fi epic "Metalstorm" to Jody Moreno to be her directorial debut. With that last detail in mind, Colt quit his menial job and was flying over to Australia in no time. 

Director David Leitch had himself been a stuntman, so this project that celebrated the contribution of stunt workers in films was very close to his heart. He had been a stunt double for stars like Brad Pitt, so he knew the mindset of Colt Seavers better than anyone. From "John Wick" (2014) to "Bullet Train" (2022), stunt work had always been a major aspect of Letich films. In "Fall Guy," the practical stunt work kicked into even higher gear.

Fresh from his Oscar nomination for "Barbie" (2023) and his exhilarating live performance of his song "I'm Just Ken" at the Oscar show, Ryan Gosling continues to ride this crest in his showbiz career with his magnetic portrayal of Colt Seaver in this film. He went all-in in the film's over-the-top action scenes with all the vehicular jumping and brutal fighting. His wry sense of comedy and romantic leading man charisma also served him good stead. 

Emily Blunt is always a reliable actress, and she made sure Jody Moreno also made her action-star presence here, even giving us her karaoke rendition of "Against All Odds."  The musical soundtrack with songs from Kiss to Taylor Swift was exciting and nostalgic, with recognizable soundbites from "Miami Vice" and "The Six Million Dollar Man." The surprise cameos that came at the end upped the good vibes even more. 8/10. 

Review of MEN ARE FROM QC, WOMEN ARE FROM ALABANG: Distance and Determination

May 2, 2024

Aica Villanueva (Heaven Peralejo) lived in Alabang with her mother Lucy (Angela del Rosario) and sister Bea (Lhian Gimeno). As her absentee father Noel (Anjo Yllana) was irresponsible, she was the only breadwinner of her family. Even though she really wanted to be a journalist, she focused on her work as a marketing executive under a very demanding boss Ms. Dina (Giselle Sanchez). She believed that a boyfriend would only interfere with her work. 

Tino Guerra (Marco Gallo) was the scion of a wealthy family based in Quezon City. His father was a very busy architect often working abroad. He lived with his mother Chari (Phoemela Baranda), his elder brother Enzo (Ivan Padilla) and younger sister Tara (Sofie Jewel). Instead of joining his father's firm, he wanted to find direction and prove his worth first, so he took a job as a graphic designer. Fate had it that this was in the same firm as Aica. 

The screenplay written by Kiko Abrillo and Kristine Gabriel was based on a best-selling 2013 book of the same title written by Filipino-Chinese author Stanley Chi. The book was described as a comical spoof on the American best-seller John Gray's "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" which dealt on the premise that some essential psychological differences exist between men and women that cause them to have relationship problems.  

This film by Gino M. Santos (whose last film was "Sin Island" in 2018) began and progressed as a typical rom-com would. The initial awkward meet-cute at a cafe had to happen before they unexpectedly realize that they will work in the same office. There wasn't much hassle at the start of their relationship, but the meat of the story happens after a two-year jump, when their events in their lives diverge and things start to sour between them.

People who have been in romantic relationships can relate with the issues that crop up between the couple, with their respective points of view. Male viewers will feel Tino's puzzlement at Aica's unhappiness despite everything that he felt like he had given and sacrificed for her. I can only guess that female viewers will identify with Aica's grief and dissatisfaction, given the personal challenges she was also facing at the same time. 

The love team of Heaven Peralejo and Marco Gallo was launched in the TV series "The Rain in Espana" (2023). Since then, they had one film "The Ship Show" (Jason Paul Laxamana, 2023) and one more TV series together "Safe Skies, Archer," also directed by Gino M. Santos. By now, they had developed a potent romantic chemistry between them. The skills of both actors for tearful drama had also been honed very well. 

It may be difficult to imagine that Marco Gallo's first three feature films were actually released on Vivamax: "Gluta" (Darryl Yap, 2021), "Ang Manananggal na Nahahati ang Puso" (Darryl Yap, 2022) and "Kitty K7" (Joy Aquino, 2022). It was always good to see actors who began in Vivamax films, like Gallo, Rose Van Ginkel (as Tino's friend Mia), or Wilbert Ross (as Aica's friend Raf), graduating into more mainstream, less naughty fare. 6/10. 

 

Review of CHALLENGERS: Rival Romeos

May 1, 2024

At a 2019 Challenger event in New Rochelle, tennis champ Art Donaldson (Mike Faist) and his long-estranged friend Patrick Zweig (Josh O'Connor) meet each other at the finals match. Watching them from the front row was Art's wife and coach Tashi Duncan (Zendaya).  At this point, Art was just a US Open short of a career Grand Slam, but he had been on a post-injury slump lately. Tashi thought winning this minor tournament would boost his confidence. 

Back in 2006, when Art and Josh were still teenagers, they won the junior doubles title at the US Open. When they met rising female star Tashi Duncan (Zendaya), both of them got enamored with her. They succeeded to convince her to visit them at their dorm room for some intimate chitchat among other things. However when they asked Tashi for her phone number, she said that she would only give it to the boy who will win his match the next day. 

This dark romance-sports comedy is the first feature film script by Justin Kuritzkes, then only known for his viral 2011 YouTube video called "Potion Seller." The script tackles the relationships between friends and lovers in the competitive world of professional tennis. While the main story would seem to be the love triangle, and there were plenty of steamy hetero sex scenes, but there was a generous gay subtext all over it. 

It was brought to the big screen by celebrated Italian director Luca Guadagnino, whose 2017 film "Call Me By Your Name" was nominated for an Oscar for Best Picture. The gay theme here may not as overt as it was in "Call," but Guadagnino was more than just suggestive about it. The sexual tension was obviously there between the boys, and Guadagnino knew how to build it up and pile it on, even if it made his straight audience squirm. 

Guadagnino shot his tennis scenes with Thai cinematographer Sayombhu Mukdeeprom in a unique exciting style, as if the viewer himself was serving and hitting the ball. Coupled with the percolating score by Reznor and Ross, this made for a thrilling viewing experience. The nonlinear telling of the story may be confusing at times, but they served well Guadagnino's intention to reveal details of their story with a sense of surprise.

Zendaya is a true movie star, and she can really command the screen when she's on. It may not always be convincing that her character Tashi had really aged. Mike Faist was clean-cut and earnest as the golden boy Art, while Josh O'Connor (who won an Emmy for playing a detestable young Prince Charles in "The Crown" Season 4) was appropriately scruffy and roguish as the bad egg Patrick, in perfect contrast. 8/10